To date or not to date?

Hmmm been thinking lately whether I want to throw myself into the dating game or not? Bit two minded about it, one part of me wants too as I feel the time is right to meet someone but the other part of me is saying don’t bother as I just can’t seem to trust the male kind anymore, I’ve been through so much hurt and pain plus I’ve lost all my confidence I just cant seem to decide on what to do? I know all males aren’t the same but do I really need to get my heart broken falling for a person every time for it not too lead anywhere until I do find the right one? I dunno I can’t sit around and wait for someone to fall into my lap lol, it’s difficult these days to find someone that isn’t after just sex! It seems to be an all screw nation no one wants to date then if all is good settle with each other they’re more interested in a quick shag and that’s it! There is a saying “since sex got easier to get, love got harder to find” such true words.
Not sure on this think I’ll let it lay for a bit until someone steps up.



Pull myself together

I don’t really know where to start the kids dad picked them up earlier for a half day visit his choice and happened to mention that he’s applied for a divorce and the paperwork is on its way! Now ok we’ve been separated for the last near on 3 years and one would think I’d be full of joy but on the contrary I’m actually full of sadness not because I’m still in love with the man or that I want him back or even still have feelings for him it’s the fact the 10 years I gave him, the children I had for him, being disowned by my family for him, to leave my friends my home everything and to sign a bit of paper to throw all that away is so very hard to do I just don’t feel ready! I will sign it eventually in my own time but for now I have no intentions on doing so.. I need to cry it out then pull the curtains (which was once said by a very special friend of mine lol) and try to get on.


(Still at least my sense of humour is still in check)


Don’t say a word…

I get so frustrated when I can’t say what I want to say or share my thoughts the way I want too just so others don’t get upset or get things twisted or understand the wrong way, like I could say “I love you” only because at that moment I just feel the love but can’t really say it due to people thinking its actually specifically aimed at them or “I hate you” again the same thing happening.. Dunno it’s really difficult expressing myself as I don’t want to upset or hurt anyone or even give the wrong impression so choosing my words wisely is mainly on the agenda at the minute lol, the way I can express myself seems to be via song lyrics and those pictures you get on Facebook with meaningful words on them.. Here’s some that I like below




I do tend to wear my heart on my sleeve, I fall so easily as well as hurt easy but like I say such is life…